Thursday, July 03, 2008

Not Feeling It

Just feel really blah.  Not getting into the scrap stuff, photo stuff, or anything. That's just how my attitude is right now.  Nothing set in stone, just feelings.  Tomorrow I could be making something or really into taking photos or whatever, but right now, and for awhile, just not feeling it.  More so I think since the Scrap in Style event.  Really disappointed in that in a lot of different ways.  Didn't have high expectations, just perceptions and gut feelings. 

I'm so tired of seeing eye candy and how cool people's lives look, how they act, how they talk, the lingo.  I could throw up I'm so sick of it.  It just leaves me empty.

Oh, yeah, I've played a little with Photoshop, you can tell from my recent photos that they've been photoshopped.  Feels good to play around with all of that, but I hate the computer BS.  For instance, I'm following the class for Photoshop Elements, and it says to go to you Brush tool bar thingy, not there, just the wand.  So I pull out The Missing Manual for PS Elements for Mac, and after reading a lot of useless shit, I finally hit the letter B and finally I get the brush.  Why the hell wasn't the brush there to begin with?  Nothing like it was in Windows.  Not even under the wand button.  And you know how you usually could add buttons to your list of toolbars?  Well, nothing there to do that.  Then yesterday, I'm playing and it's there.  Whatever.  Glad it's there, but where was it to begin with and why wasn't it where it should have been?Ugh!!!  Really hate all this.  It's what I did for a living when I worked and I got so tired of it.  Always something to learn (which isn't bad), but the computer crap that's out there doesn't give you a simple answer and if you ask people, Lord forbid, they give you answers, like "darling, it's just as simple as doing blah blah blah."  And I feel like saying, "no, sweetie, you must not be using the system like I'm using it and don't assume I have the same setup you have," but no, I stop and realize it's not worth it to talk to people that CALL ME DARLING, SWEETIE.  That is so demeaning.  Oh, it's not always.  I have a friend that will say Sweetie to me, but I can tell she doesn't mean it in a condescending kind of way, she is not talking down to me.  

One thing I am feeling for sure is a sore body.  Been hitting the yoga classes and yesterday I did 10 minutes on the bike at the gym before the class.  The doc says to just try out the waters, trial and error.  Easier said then done, I know.  I mean that's how I hurt my foot to begin with was doing too much too fast and thinking it was nothing.  Well, now, I have to listen to my body a whole lot more.  And that's where the yoga is just wonderful.  He did say some people wear the Richie brace for 2-3 years.  You know it's been a year exactly since I hurt my foot.  I would have been better off with a broken bone than a torn tendon, but with different doctors and approaches to letting it heal, I've had to be patient and grieve a little too.  I mean, shoes, OMG, loved them.  I will never be in a pair of flip flops again, I'll never go bare foot again, I probably won't ever wear my platform high heels again.  It really sucks, but I'm over that now because I can tell that from constantly "having" to wear my hiking or running shoes with the Richie brace ALL the time, has really helped.  I mean it's not like normal.  Like it really got achy and I started limping again at the SIS event at the hotel.  My key kept not working, and I had to walk all the way back and forth three times.  That's the kind of stuff that is a bit much for a healing foot and it sucks, but if I rest it, it's bounces back a little faster than before.  And I know some people with similar injuries and after tons of patience and time, they finally are in regular shoes again and thought that day would never happen.  And even running again.  And then he said something I heard from the other doctor too is that the MRI isn't always accurate.  He said it showed that there could have been a tear, but if he had done surgery, there may have been nothing or it could have been worse than the MRI showed.  So, sticking with the yoga and the bike when I can, and wear my shoes and brace all the time.  All in all, I was so happy with my last visit with the doc on Tuesday.

I think I'll go watch another Graham Norton show from the DVR.  I just love BBC America.

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2 comments:

  1. Life goes in waves, it's just whether you want to ride each one or not. Hang in there :)
    PS thanks for stopping by my blog, made me smile to know you enjoyed the things coming out of my head lol wish I could just tip it all out sometimes lol

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi you!!!

    What a nice surprise to find your comment on my blog!!! It was a bright spot in my day!

    I hope you have a great 4th of July weekend!!!

    Thanks for visitin'! : .)

    ReplyDelete

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